First World Problems
Lyric:
Nerd rap infests your internet. You left a trap, but it's empty.
MC Frontalot took a gape but the bait wasn't tempting,
ending up uncaged and at large
to talk smack at you through the networking appliance that's in charge
of every drip of your attention.
Yo, when mine goes out I've got to log in just to mention
my disappointment at the interruption of convenience.
I mean just: a lot left, but none up in between this
couple of minutes here and a couple of minutes later.
It's an outrage, at the price I paid. These dictators
of my leisure rule with an iron fist.
Has anybody ever been so put upon as this?
Your GPS run out of battery (first world problem)
Got to wake up Saturday (first world problem)
You just delayed a honeymoon (first world problem)
Pledge season's coming soon (first world problem)
Half your friend list is spam accounts (first world problem)
And your center channel speaker's out (first world problem)
Muffy, my hair regrowth cream is mostly ineffective
and I'm struggling to keep this in perspective,
but I feel like a massive injustice occurred.
Says "regrows hair" on the tube (in the words)
in a third — or maybe a quarter — of all users.
I must have got swindled. Is it a fault? Of whose is?
Oooh, Muffy, Muffy, I had all the servants tortured.
Did you keep them on retainer? Do you got some more on order?
'Cause I can't comb my hair on my own no more.
I got accustomed to the lifestyle, sniffed upon the spore
and it molded up my innards, made the blood turn blue.
Muffy, Muffy, there's a revolution; what we're gonna do?
Misplaced the Ambien (first world problem)
Left a participle dangling (first world problem)
You're scheduling your root canal (first world problem)
Your grad schooling had no rationale (first world problem)
You didn't like your appetizer (first world problem)
Your yacht got capsized (a first world problem)
Now while our capitalism is in a minor kerfuffle,
you have to hustle. Before the fates come, reshuffle.
Rustle up another couple grievances and air 'em.
You can laugh about it later (maybe needed while despairing).
For the moment though, you ordered half caf, didn't get it;
there was no TV set when you jetted; internet resetted
itself just as I was in the middle
of tournament play, and so I suffered from transmittal
interruption. Completely ruined my day.
MC Frontalot's a jackass, that's all I'm trying to say.
People buy CDs in these days of disaster,
so poor me: I have to be a professional rapper.
No bubbles in the soda cup (first world problem)
App crashed when you loaded up (first world problem)
Phone's OS is outta date (first world problem)
Colors won't calibrate (first world problem)
They never stock the snack you want (first world problem)
Caught herpes from a celebutante (first world problem)
Got wallhacked in PVP (first world problem)
Oh no, HD-DVD (first world problem)
Pixels aren't perfect square (first world problem)
Your favorite rapper isn't debonair (first world problem)
You own too many underwear (first world problem)
And you're not much of a millionaire (first world problem)
Nerd rap infests your internet. You left a trap, but it's empty.
MC Frontalot took a gape but the bait wasn't tempting,
ending up uncaged and at large
to talk smack at you through the networking appliance that's in charge
of every drip of your attention.
Yo, when mine goes out I've got to log in just to mention
my disappointment at the interruption of convenience.
I mean just: a lot left, but none up in between this
couple of minutes here and a couple of minutes later.
It's an outrage, at the price I paid. These dictators
of my leisure rule with an iron fist.
Has anybody ever been so put upon as this?
Your GPS run out of battery (first world problem)
Got to wake up Saturday (first world problem)
You just delayed a honeymoon (first world problem)
Pledge season's coming soon (first world problem)
Half your friend list is spam accounts (first world problem)
And your center channel speaker's out (first world problem)
Muffy, my hair regrowth cream is mostly ineffective
and I'm struggling to keep this in perspective,
but I feel like a massive injustice occurred.
Says "regrows hair" on the tube (in the words)
in a third — or maybe a quarter — of all users.
I must have got swindled. Is it a fault? Of whose is?
Oooh, Muffy, Muffy, I had all the servants tortured.
Did you keep them on retainer? Do you got some more on order?
'Cause I can't comb my hair on my own no more.
I got accustomed to the lifestyle, sniffed upon the spore
and it molded up my innards, made the blood turn blue.
Muffy, Muffy, there's a revolution; what we're gonna do?
Misplaced the Ambien (first world problem)
Left a participle dangling (first world problem)
You're scheduling your root canal (first world problem)
Your grad schooling had no rationale (first world problem)
You didn't like your appetizer (first world problem)
Your yacht got capsized (a first world problem)
Now while our capitalism is in a minor kerfuffle,
you have to hustle. Before the fates come, reshuffle.
Rustle up another couple grievances and air 'em.
You can laugh about it later (maybe needed while despairing).
For the moment though, you ordered half caf, didn't get it;
there was no TV set when you jetted; internet resetted
itself just as I was in the middle
of tournament play, and so I suffered from transmittal
interruption. Completely ruined my day.
MC Frontalot's a jackass, that's all I'm trying to say.
People buy CDs in these days of disaster,
so poor me: I have to be a professional rapper.
No bubbles in the soda cup (first world problem)
App crashed when you loaded up (first world problem)
Phone's OS is outta date (first world problem)
Colors won't calibrate (first world problem)
They never stock the snack you want (first world problem)
Caught herpes from a celebutante (first world problem)
Got wallhacked in PVP (first world problem)
Oh no, HD-DVD (first world problem)
Pixels aren't perfect square (first world problem)
Your favorite rapper isn't debonair (first world problem)
You own too many underwear (first world problem)
And you're not much of a millionaire (first world problem)
Name the Savage Country
The following description depicts a country in the world. The various aspects of life within this country are explained and certain clues are given as to the country's identity.
Education: Illiteracy is widespread; most children quit school before grade eight. They have to drop out to work on the land or at odd jobs. Children are economic units, essential to their families' survival. There is no time for them to go to school or to train for professions.
Disease and Health Care: The infant mortality rate is high. Death in childbirth is risked by every mother. The sanitation diseases-dysentery, typhus, typhoid, diarrhea-kill young and old alike. Children are afflicted with parasites and worms, the cures for which are few and difficult to obtain. Tuberculosis is another major killer. Hospitals are few and hard to reach. Medicine is just emerging from its medieval traditions. There are no publicly funded medical plans: health care, even if it is available, is too expensive for the average person. Dental care consists mainly of extractions. By the time a person reaches thirty chances are he has few teeth left. The 30-year-old has a life expectancy of 25 more years. Life is "solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and short".
Movement: Mobility is limited and expensive. True, there is a good national railway system, but it misses many communities. Beyond the railways, the only way to travel is by horse, by boat or on foot. Some trips that would take two hours by car take three days. Most people are born, grow up and die in the same village.
Money: Subsistence farmers and wage-earners can rarely acquire anything beyond the basics. Up-to-date consumer products are available, but most people have no money to purchase them.
Birth Rate: People have many babies. Parents want to be taken care of when they get sick or too old to work, and they must have at least six children to ensure that one son will survive to adulthood. (There are no old age pensions, welfare benefits or extended care facilities for the elderly.)
Energy: Fuel is a precious commodity. Wood and coal are the primary fuels for heating, cooking and industry. Labour on farms is done mostly by muscles-animal and human. Precious coal oil is saved for the lamps at night.
Work: The majority of people are engaged in subsistence farming and fishing. Work is endless. Every hand is needed because there are so few machines. Conditions in the mining and logging industries are particularly harsh. In the cities, factory working conditions are terrible-low wages, long hours, no holidays, a six-day week, no employee benefits. The few mercantile and professional jobs are limited to those with advanced education and family connections.
You have just read a description of a nation thirty years after it achieved independence. Since independence day (the natives call it Dominion Day), these people have thrust aside colonial status-being ruled by another country-and now govern themselves. This country has a long way to go, but success is certainly possible. It takes a long time to improve health care, transportation, education and working conditions. Thirty years is not long at all!
ASSIGNMENT: Read the description carefully looking for clues and suggest which country it is with reasons for your suggestion.
http://hdr.undp.org/en/statistics/
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